The Naked Truth, No. 18

This excerpt is from Sara Maitland's How to Make Love to a Saint:

"She was open to me, completely open.  I could peel back her skin, lift out her ribs one by one, laying them in a neat pile beside us.  She breathed slowly, calmly, trustingly.  Warm, her innards were warm, pulsing, steaming slightly though my room was not cold.  I buried my hands to the wrist in yards of soft intestine; they felt silky and alive.  I could feel the rhythm of her life against my relaxed knuckles, a firm irregular vibration against my fingertips, pulsing.

"'One day,' I said, someone won't put it all back.  You'll die.  You should be more careful.'"

Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are

From the New York Times

I've been thinking a lot about what it means to come out lately.  These days, it seems there are many kinds of coming out, from assertions and revelations of queer identities to announcements of a sex-positive lifestyle.  I myself have come out as a writer of erotica, a sex columnist, and a sex-positive, pro-porn feminist.  When I came out as bisexual, however, I just started telling people.  I'd known for so long that I identified as bisexual that it didn't feel like a big deal...though of course, in truth, it was.  Owning my sexuality has made me feel freer, stronger and more creative, and has done wonders for my fantasy life as well as my sense of self-actualization.  It has also raised my self-esteem to know that I can be me in the world.

Anyway, take a look at a selection of quotes, articles and beautiful photos from the NY Times.  I'm still exploring the pages and have been impressed so far.

In what ways have you come out?  And has it helped or changed you?  How?

For My Friend, With Love

It's been quite a week.  Tonight, I am rooting for a writing friend who is in hospital, and my gosh, he's special to me.  His stories are filled with the aliveness of desire and I love reading his work -- in fact, I love being with him, full stop.  He and his partner are greatly adored.

So, dear friend, this one's for you.  It's a quote from Susie Bright's How to Write a Dirty Story.  The section title is "Assume Everyone is Sexual":

"Mrs. Robinson of The Graduate was sexy because she was old and corrupt and unabashedly horny.  The Beast in Beauty and the Beast was deeply erotic in his desperation and devotion.  O in the Story of O was an absolutely ordinary little thing whose boundless sexual masochism was in stark contrast to her bourgeois, dull past.  Yes, bring on the homely, the deformed, the aged, the plain, and the absurd--these characters are the inspiration for the most profound erotic discoveries."

Ain't that just so true?  We are sexual because we are human.

And dear mate, I also thought you'd like the Mrs. Robinson pic, because I believe you yourself could have created Mrs. R.

Quoted with love.

When Rope Bondage Leaves You Tongue-Tied

Photo: Raimond Spekking
Photomodel: Dani

Folks, I've published a new piece (about a rope bondage class I won't forget) at the Good Vibrations Magazine.  I hope you enjoy.


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Gone, Baby, Gone

Hi folks.  I'm processing a couple of pieces of really bad news and it looks like I'll be unlikely to blog for a while.  Thanks for checking in with me and have a great week.

-LF

NB. Crisis calmed muchly by beloved friends who care.

Rest in Peace

James Marsters, aka Spike.
Swoon...

As many of us know, there's nothing like drawing on the heartache of rejection to create powerful art, and never is this more apparent than in Buffy the Vampire Slayer's "Once More with Feeling," (Season Six, Whedon et. al.).  Check out this YouTube vid of Spike (aka James Marsters) who is in a dark kind of erotic love with Buffy.  Spike is a vampire, Buffy is a vampire slayer.  Background:  There is a mysterious spell on the town of Sunnydale where everyone has started expressing their emotions by bursting into song...  No one knows what's behind it, but as Buffy (Sarah Michelle Gellar) states, the supernatural doesn't usually "lead to hugs and puppies."

Unless you've known the heartache of rejection, how could you create something as hot, black, beautiful and true as this little number?  Big thanks to Joss Whedon and team.

The Hot Topic, vol. 7: Happy Endings (The Royal Way)

Pic: John Pannell

Blogger was down and what was I to do?  I had no way of posting.  Oh, the drama!  Seriously, when I'm blogless I'm not a happy person, so I'm glad to now be able to share my new Hot Topic column with you - Happy Endings (The Royal Way) is up at the Nervous Breakdown.  I hope you enjoy.

More soon! xoxo

Not a Mother of Children

With less than an hour left of (American) Mother's Day I find myself googling Anais Nin.  Why?  Because I am sure she once wrote, "I am not a mother of children," implying she was the mother of creations, art, writing, ideas, relationships, passions, hopes, thoughts, feelings...but not kids.  And yet, when I googled the quote, I didn't find it so used by Anais -- it seemed I had misremembered.  Interesting, hm?

But I believe Anais would have written it.  And in any case, I can write it myself:

I am not a mother of children.  And perhaps you aren't either.  But that doesn't mean we aren't creators.  Far from it, baby.  Far from it.

The Naked Truth, No. 16

Well, I'm back from the UK.  Thanks for sticking with me.  Today, here's look at how we can use fantasy to make pain meaningful...even pleasurable.  The topic?  Waxing, sex and pain, courtesy of the brilliant Rachel Kramer Bussel:

"The intimate yet clinical nature is one paradox of the pussy waxing experience. The other is that the pain—though as minimal as possible—is still pain. Because I lean toward being a masochist, sometimes I can eroticize the pain. I think of it like candle wax in a scene, and use my kinky training to get through the momentary pain for the reward of sleek skin. The difference in payoff, though, is striking.

"If I were being covered in candle wax, it would probably come with a side of dirty talk, either telling me what a dirty girl I am for wanting it, or praising me for good behavior. Now, I care less about what my waxer thinks regarding my appearance than I do my lovers, but there is part of me that wants her to be pleased. While I may get praise after a waxing, it doesn’t give me the same glow as praise from a top." From Rachel Kramer Bussel's Eden Fantasy's Sexis column

Britain: Queen of Kink

Hi folks.  I am back in Britain right now (oh my God, the tea is good), so I have sporadic internet access.  Yes, it is the land of BDSM.  No, I have not whipped anyone, as yet (well, not on this trip anyway).  I am going to try to blog today, but don't be surprised if you don't hear from me as often as you usually do.

Also, is there something kinky about the Queen, or is it just me?