Tattoos are Sexy (Send Money to the EMA Fund!)

I think tattoos are sexy.  Why?  Because I love the idea of skin as a canvas or page on which we express our beliefs.  Do I have a tattoo myself?  No, but maybe I'm just waiting for my moment!  I'd have to really love the symbols I chose -- they'd need to capture my passions.

Speaking of passions, my dear friend Erin Kate Ryan is raising money for the EMA Fund (The Eastern Massachussetts Abortion Fund), a wonderful organization that helps folks to have much needed abortions.  Want to know how tattoos fit into all this?  On the left is a picture of Erin Kate's tattoo -- the EMA Fund logo.  See, she pledged that if she met her fundraising target last year she would wear the logo on her skin forever.  I can't think of a more passionate gesture.  On her site, Erin Kate gives her reasons for getting the tattoo.  Here are just a couple:

"Because it represents just one fraction of the loss of control that someone faces when trying to find abortion funding..." and "...because abortion access is a critical component of bodily integrity and autonomy."

Isn't that blazing and profound?  That's Erin Kate for you.  I've donated and I hope you will too.

In Erotica, There's Hope

Fun news: I have stories published in two brand new anthologies.  With this Ring, I Thee Bed (Harlequin Spice), edited by Alison Tyler, is a beautiful collection of wedding erotica.  In my story, Kiss the Bride, a pair of actors who are playing newlyweds get very into their onstage roles.  And in For Humans, Love's All About Weight, which appears in Kristina Wright's Dream Lover (Cleis Press) a bird man seems like Hettie's ideal guy...but is he worth the risk?

Well, these anthologies are arriving through the mail just when I need some stories to help me transcend this world.  This week's brutal attack on a transgender woman really got to me.  I feel like we're living in a crazy society where prejudice is more and more rife.  If only people could be delighted by our variety!  Instead, we too often hear of ignorance, violence and abuse.

So I will continue writing fiction about beautiful sexual awakenings, in which my characters transform.  I will write about what can happen when we love one another.  In erotica, there's often hope.

The Naked Truth, No. 15

The Silver Bean in Chicago
by Anish Kapoor

Thanks to one of our generous readers, today's Naked Truth comes from an article about sex toys (in the New York Times).  In the piece, which is entitled Vibrators Carry the Conversation, author Hilary Howard interviews individuals about their own attitudes towards sex toys.  Here's an excerpt:

"Men interviewed proclaimed themselves not only unthreatened by the addition of accessories to their partners’ sex lives, but downright enthusiastic. Jeremy, 31, a content strategist in the entertainment business who lives in New York and wanted his last name omitted for privacy, said, 'From my perspective, a woman who has thoroughly explored her own body, both alone and with or without whichever toys she finds interesting, makes for a significantly better lover.'"

It's a great article that also speaks to the variety of vibrators now available as well as the reasons we need them.  Make love, not war, folks.  And that includes vibrators.

P.S. Anish Kapoor's Silver Bean in Chicago always puts me in mind of a massive vibrator (and I mean that in the best possible way!).  In fact, if you look at the wonderful designs we're seeing in today's sex toys, that isn't surprising.  For example, check this one out.  

Lana's Burlesque on Google Books

Photo from thegloss.com

It has been far from an easy weekend, though I was thrilled when a friend pointed out that an excerpt from I, Anita (my story of a burlesque dancer, which is published in Best Women's Erotica 2011) can be found, free of charge, on Google Books.  The piece was inspired by the erotica of Anais Nin.  I hope you enjoy.

The Naked Truth, No. 14

Today's Naked Truth comes from Anais Nin.  In her diary, she writes about how Gonzalo More speaks to her, passionately, in her native language at a party, but will not get close to her physically.  He isn't yet her lover.

"All this in Spanish.  My blood hears Spanish.  I hear Spanish through dark subterranean channels.  Always I awaited Spanish love language.  To hear him better my cheek touches his dark Indian cheek and I wish he would hold me as George holds me a moment later, holds me only to feel, to press me hotly, and we dance, sexes soldered, hot, burning, saying: Open your legs, God, I want you like hell, I could take you right here.  Whore, whore, whore at last.

But dancing with Gonzalo is the dream...  'Anais, I have seen thousands of women but never one like you...'"  From Fire, the unexpurgated diaries of Anais Nin, 1934-37 (p. 247)

Smouldering stuff!

Some Oniony Sex Advice

This vid from The Onion is the funniest thing I've seen all week.  And frankly, given the state of the world at the moment, we could do with a laugh, wouldn't you say?  (Via Dr. Ruthie, with thanks).

The Naked Truth, No. 13

Maggie Gyllenhaal
in Secretary

Do take a look at Charlie's Glickman's blog post When Scientists Don't Understand Sex: Feminism, Dominance, and Arousal in which he brilliantly argues against the notion (suggested by neuroscientists in Psychology Today) that gender equality inhibits arousal:

"...Even though some women do want a “bad boy” in the bedroom, that doesn’t mean they want a jerk in the rest of their lives. We’ve often heard about the attempt to bridge the virgin-whore dichotomy by folks who are looking for (or who want to be) “a lady in the streets, a slut in the sheets.” I suspect what some women want is someone who can be a “bad boy” when it comes to sex and a respectful, open communicator the rest of the time. Is that so hard to imagine? What about offering the possibility that gender equality is what allows us to explore our fantasies with a partner who respects us and acknowledges our humanity. It doesn’t have to be an either/or and in fact, having a relationship that is founded on equality and respect often gives us the safety to explore our fantasies."

As per usual, I love how articulate and utterly right Charlie is.  Spot on.  Bravo!

The Naked Truth, No. 12

Bogart & Bergman in Notorious

Tonight's Naked Truth is by Victoria Redel in her delicious little essay, Kissing.

"Could I have known when Charlie R. took me up the Harwood building stairwell for my first, fast, dry, twelve-year-old kiss that I'd become a woman who loves kissing, a woman who'd drive across state lines for the moment just before the kiss begins."  From Kissing by Victoria Redel, in Dirty Words (ed. Ellen Sussman).

Oh, how true.  I'm with you, Victoria.

The Hot Topic, vol. 6: When Slut is a Dirty Word

I have a new Hot Topic column up at the Nervous Breakdown.  This month, I don my fishnets and join Slut Walk in the fight against slut shaming.

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Slut Walk Boston

Folks taking part in Slut Walk Toronto

Folks who read the post below about Slut Walk Toronto will be pleased to hear that Slut Walk Boston is taking place on May 7th.  I'll have just flown back from the UK, but will be there in selectively slutty clothing, and if I don't have a banner I'll still have a voice.

We're reclaiming the word slut.  See you there.

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Academics & Activists on Sex Work

Folks, I am rushing around like a blue-arsed fly (hmm, is that a British expression?) but have lots I want to share with you, so here it is:

Thanks to Petra Boynton, I've been reading the initial findings of an ESRC funded research study at the University of Leeds (UK) into the experiences of folks who work as erotic dancers.  It looks like a well-designed study (that's the psychologist in me speaking -- did you know I have a degree in Psychology?).  You can also check out the study via Petra Boynton's blog, where she summarises the findings and speaks with her usual wisdom about breaking through stereotypes and assumptions.

Also, if you haven't visited Charlie Glickman's blog, please do.  Charlie's vision is inspiring to say the least.  He writes powerfully about sexuality and gender, equal rights, inclusive language, sex education, and a host of other vital topics.  Take a look at his recent blog post Sex Work is to Trafficking as Sex is to Rape.

By the way, also take a look at Betty Dodson & Carlin Ross on how to fight slut shaming and then be inspired by Slutwalk Toronto (via Rachel Kramer Bussel, with thanks).

Phew!  That's all I had to say.  Now back to critiquing manuscripts...

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The Naked Truth, No. 11

Pic from streetsie.com

In this month's Bitch there's an interview with Loree Erickson who, nearly a decade ago, "wheeled through a San Francisco sex shop and picked up a lesbian porn zine whose headlines promised some sexy disability action..."  But what did Erickson find within the pages?  Just one photo of a person in a wheelchair.  So she vowed "then and there, to become a porn star."  The resulting short film is Erickson's Want.  The interview and article are by Chelsea Temple Jones:

Temple Jones:  You've sexualized your wheelchair in your work.  Why?

Erickson:  [The wheelchair] becomes part of you.  Like this chair--it turns on very easily, literally.  It always just gets hit and turns on and makes a loud noise when it turns on.  But we kind of joke about that.  Like in the movie... I said, "I think you just turned me on," and [my costar's] like, "I'll turn your chair off, but I won't turn you off."

In the interview, Temple Jones explains how Erickson's 15-minute homemade short has been "screened in nearly 30 countries and several university classrooms, and is slowly rubbing, buzzing, flicking and licking its way towards defining a genre of 'crip porn' with a strong feminist edge."

Now if that isn't proactive artistry, I don't know what is.  Bravo, Loree Erickson!